Wednesday, July 23, 2014

20140722

It was finally the arrival of this day. It's not what special date as well, just a normal working day with my senior aka manager aka boss here with us. Went back here from home on 30 June, start working on July. Well, it is the last month fighting with all my colleagues, my second year start soon right one week later. Don't know what kik, I just feel like jotting about ups & downs during my full time job so it became my little memories when i reread my older post in future. It had been fully one year I'm here. As days gone, things happened, lesson learned, experience earned. There are some customers do catch my mind. First was a 40 over lady, Ms Daisy, she bought a Michael Kors frame with me. She was like my mum, telling me big girl don't cry, do your best and hoping me doing eye test for her during her next return. She had sent me an email months ago and she told me she did sent to our HQ, I felt so embarrassed as I don't do anything beside chatting with her. The email to HQ stated that :

“I was extremely impressed with your outstanding staff namely Ms. Fung Shi Hien and Mr. Desmond. As, both spelled out the essence of MOG beautifully ~ to help the world see better and provide excellent personalized service. Yes, I believe with the new pair of Michael Kors from MOG, KL Festival City not only helping me enhance my ‘visual and appearance’ but it would ultimately aid in all my up and coming presentations. On similar note, my mother is happy with her new St, Berry Eyewear which is within her budget. I would highly recommend MOG, KL Festival City to anyone considering a new EYEWEAR and outstanding service”.



Daisy Poh Yoke Cheng
Consultant

this is the first customer which gave me so much of confidence to do myself. When she came to collect her glasses, she still give me a little gift which i stick on my bedroom until today. It was amazing to have this patient. I hope to you again soon Ms Daisy, best wishes in your life. 

Few days ago, I met a PHD holder customer. He brought one broken frame and going to find some frame to fix his own lenses. During our chatting, I tried to understand what he actually wants and we chat like long lost friend. He is clear with my course and my works and trying so much to give me encouragement. Around almost 2 hours of talking,lastly he bought a Tag Heuer frame and a pair of polycarbonate lens with me. What impressed me was those words he told me before he left.

He shook my hand and said "Good girl, nice to meet you up. We had visited many optical shop but we didn't get the similar service as you provided. Didn't request for more discount, we pay for your service, see you soon my good girl, best of luck." 

I didn't know what i did to him but I knew that I did a great job. I send him off with a pair of thankful eyes. Deep in heart I knew that I will own this customer forever. I cherish what he said. My heart was like pumped in lots of positive energy. Sir, thank you, i appreciate you, as PHD, as my patient, my customer, my listener and also my friend. 

One more one more, that's early morning which all of us were doing cleaning before the business start. An arabian stepped in with a contact lens box. He told he wanted to buy that. (Oasys Astigmatism). I'm so sorry to tell him that the contact lenses need to order, he said he need it urgently. I apologize for my failure to help him out. He had turned around to seek for other optical shop. He went back around one hour later and told me to order for him. When I was printing the receipt for him,  He asked me: you know why I come back to you although your price is higher? I was shocked at first, I know our price maybe slightly higher compare to others. He replied me: you have a good smile. Aww, it melted me at that particular moment. I remember on that day, there are FEWSSSSS pimples on my face which i hate it sooo much, they totally spoilt my mood to serve customer. But, i didn't failed to do my part. ;P A beautiful mood early in the morning may bring you luck along the day. Thanks for your praising, I will always keep my lips up. 

I believe in this quote: treat others with your heart to the fullest, they will do the same. This is how i survived for this year in this career. More challenges to come, I'm ready. Besides all this goods along this year, there are also some bad for sure. For example conflict between colleagues. Sometimes I wonder is it my own problem ? I'm just doing my part, doing my responsibilities , building up my way, am i wrong ? Sometimes i will even feel like there is no one like me here,the condition is just too hard to express. Each time I comfort myself that I have a big heart, forgive and forget, this build up good relationship. In addition, I still talked to myself almost everyday. You may have to accept grievance for now, but do believe that lord will grant you in another way round, somewhere in future. Have faith on him. Not only that, I ever broke customer frame, a little bit crashes due to adjustment. I was scared at first. I don't know where did the fear come from, I just scare. Still, saying sorry to customer. She smiled and said small matter, it's much more better than before adjustment done. whoops, I felt relief. It's just lucky that I haven meet some very fierce, very "lansi" customer. I know I will sure meet one of them one day. 
The night, whatsapp to my senior to tell him that I always couldn't do my adjustment well. It's sad when you can't even do a small thing completely. He ended up turning over the next day to solve my problem. It might be only coincide that he came for other reason, but still thank you for everything. Innumerable thanks from this kid, super childish silly kid. =D

It's good to see you again today, thanks for the teaching today, thanks for listening to my problems today and also thanks for giving me a ride home. It had been a couple of time i didn't go home by car. Honestly I really think of resign. In another saying, think maturely wherever i go, the condition will still remain the same, so I will put aside the idiot thinking of resignation.  Part time started, i think it will definitely slower down my improvement. Will do focus on my studies first, I will back to you soon. Seriously, I pray that i wouldn't lost anything along these part time months. Unable to lost anything anymore. I will do better when my fully return, I promised. I don't know what else to say besides thank you. I don't know where else to look for the second person which can teach me unconditionally and provided me with chances. Don't worry about any single thing here, have some trust in us, hand in hand, we will hand over you pretty result every month, busy at your own. Good night and take good care.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

UNTITLED.

10 OF JUNE, IT IS FINALLY THE FULLSTOP FOR MY FULL TIME JOB. AT FIRST, I HAVE TOO MUCH OF EXCITEMENTS TOWARDS THE COMING OF THIS DAY, BUT WHY MY MIND WAS SO COMPLICATED NOW? MY LAST WORKING DAY WILL BE AT THIS COMING SUNDAY, AS A REPLACEMENT DUE TO SORT OF STAFFS. THE ELEVENTH MONTH OF WORKING, I HAD SET A VERY HIGH TARGET FOR MYSELF. 9 WORKING DAYS  FOR THIS MONTH AND I HOPE MYSELF CAN FIGHT FOR 3OK SALES. ANOTHER 3K TO GO TO ACHIEVE MY TARGET, COMING SUNDAY, PLEASE DON’T DISAPPOINTED ME HELLO. PERSON IN CHARGE, PLEASE DON’T BE DISAPPOINTED IF I AM UNABLE TO HIT IT, BUT I DO HOPE THAT MY PERFORMANCE CAN SHINE YOU FOR SOME MOMENT. ALRIGHT, YESTERDAY WAS MY LAST DAY OF WORK BUT ALSO THE LAST DAY TO SEE MY RESPECTFUL BOSS, AND IT IS ALMOST ONE YEAR SEPARATION. CAN NEVER MEET UP WHEN MY PART TIME START. ALL THESE DAYS I WAS TORMENTED BY MAKING DECISION FOR MY FUTURE. GONNA START MY SECOND YEAR OF DIPLOMA SOON, SHOULD I CONTINUE MY DEGREE IN SCOTLAND, UK? SHOULD OR SHOULDN’T ? CAN OR CAN’T I ? I HAD SEEK FOR MANY SUGGESTIONS. FOR MYSELF, I WOULD LIKE TO CONTINUE THE ANOTHER 3 YEARS OF DEGREE TO FULFILL MYSELF, AT LEAST WITH A BACHELOR CERTIFICATE. THE TWO MAINS THINGS THAT BROUGHT ME FEAR: 1. HOMESICKNESS 2. LEFT THIS JOB FOR THREE YEARS. THE FIRST PROBLEM MIGHT POSSIBLE TO SOLVE BUT HOW ABOUT THE SECOND ONE? THERE MUST HAVE SOME PERSON TO REPLACE MY SPACE DURING MY ABSENCE AND I HAVE TO START ALL OVER AGAIN, FROM ZERO AND ALL MY HARD WORK THESE DAYS WAS WASTED, JUST THAT WAY. MY MIND WAS DISTRIBUTED INTO HALF. 50% THAT GO, 50% THAT STAY. NO ONE CAN HELP ME TO DECIDE MY FUTURE. I AM SO CLEAR WITH WHAT I WANT, I WANT BOTH, THAT’S SOUND SAD CAUSE IT’S QUITE IMPOSSIBLE. DEAR BOSS, YOU’RE ALWAYS MY MIND READER, MY RESPECTFUL LEADER, CAN YOU PLEASE TELL ME HOW AM I WILL BE IF I PURSUE MY DEGREE IN UK? AND SO THE OPPOSITION IF I STAY HERE WITH YOU RIGHT AFTER MY DIPLOMA? I HATE MAKING DECISION. WHAT AM I WORRY ABOUT IS I ALWAYS SCARE THAT IT’S TOO LATE, EVERYTHING IS TOO LATE FOR ME WHEN I’M A DEGREE HOLDER. CAN THIS COMPANY PUT SOME TRUST IN ME THAT I WILL BE BACK TO YOU ALL RIGHT AFTER 3 YEARS LATER ? I COULDN’T PREDICT WHAT WILL HAPPEN IN THESE COMING YEARS, BUT I HAVE A VERY CLEAR MINDSET THAT I WILL BE BACK TO YOU. NOT BECAUSE OF I CAN’T FOUND ANY BETTER COMPANY, IT’S ALL ABOUT THANKFULNESS, THANKS FOR BUILDING UP ME INTO A TOTALLY DIFFERENT GIRL. COULDN’T ASK FOR MORE, ALL THESE 11 MONTHS WERE SO FRUITFUL TO BE ONE PART OF MOG, ONE SMALL PART. FINAL EXAM IN FEW MORE DAYS THEN I WILL BE HOME. DECISION MAKING STRUGGLED ME NOWADAYS, STILL WAITING FOR MORE AND MORE SUGGESTIONS. MY TALENT SCOUT, THANKS FOR BEING THE ONE IN MY LIFE, THOSE WORDS YOU TOLD ME TWO NIGHTS AGO, I SWEAR IT WARMED ME A LOT AND I WILL GROOVE THEM IN MY MIND. FCS AND THE OWNER, YOU WILL BE MISSED. A YEAR LATER, I’M NOT ME ANYMORE AND THE SAME GOES TO THE ME 3 YEARS LATER. STAY TUNED. MOG, I DO LOVE YOU MUCH. I AM NOT SO SURE HOW IT WAS DONE, BUT I JUST DID IT. GOOD NIGHT AND SHOUT TO THE SKY AND STARS, TELLING THEM THAT I’M COMING HOME. =’) 

Sunday, May 11, 2014

献给这世上最棒的女人

五月的第二个星期天,世界性的节日,母亲节。
给妈妈打了通电话,发了封好长的whatsapp给她,这一刻,在这个角落的我好想你。
步入第19年,第一次不在她身边给她庆祝,妈妈对不起,隔了一片海洋的我们,我不能说飞就回到你身边。
我妈妈,她是这世上最棒的女人。我们不是富裕家庭,却吃得饱,穿得暖。幸福的定义是什么?一定是要拥有很多钱吗?不,我从来不这样认为。我一直都觉得我很富有,因为我有爱我如生命的爸爸妈妈。我没有住过什么富丽堂皇的家,也没有坐过什么敞篷跑车,那又有什么关系呢?重要吗?比上不足,比下多多余了。
妈妈,从小就把我们管得很严,我们想买什么,她不会无条件得给我们买,而是希望我们把书读好,每进步一次,就会买了我们所要求的物质。所以我们的物质都是有条件换来的,小时候好讨厌妈妈这样的管教方式,其他小孩都可以要什么有什么,长大后才发现妈妈的苦心计,她教会我们珍惜得来不易的东西。还记得很多次,我被妈妈狠狠得打了,有一次屁股都被打肿了,害得我坐椅子都痛,大了才发现没有妈妈那么严厉的管教,我应该没有今天的成就。爱的教育在我们身上实施不来。妈妈从小出生穷困家庭,没有很高的学历,所以明白挣钱不容易,总逼我们一定要读好书的她,是希望我们以后的日子过得容易些,她说我没有能力留太多财产给你们,得靠自己了。当妈妈苦尽甘来时,日子过得好一些时,做孩子的我们因为着要成长的原因,得离开她身边。那是多么的无奈,每次这样想,我总会叹叹气,泪又默默留下。我妈妈,她是个与众不同的女人,她也是个好强的女人。小学一年级开始,妈妈为了让我们上最好的学校,离开了爸爸的工作岗位,陪我们成长,一个星期看爸爸两次的我们,这一别就是十年。我一直都以他们为傲。妈妈在我们中学时期才告诉我们,她那时做这样的决定也是用了好大的勇气,很多夜里她也害怕,也会哭,毕竟带着两个小孩到一个陌生的城市,能不害怕吗?直到我们都出来继续读书以后,爸爸妈妈才终于一起生活了。妈妈说她要好好照顾爸爸了,因为我们他被忽略了十年。好惊叹!若我不好好读书,怎对得起他们?爸爸妈妈的大爱,真非笔墨能形容。每个女人都是爱美的,我妈妈,从我懂事以来,没买过化妆品,只买过保养品,我们用的是上千的产品,而妈妈她说她老了,不需要用那么好的,咳,我真不知我应该感动还是无奈。妈妈,她没有买过超过二百块钱的包包,没有带超过二百块钱的手表,没有上百块的衣服和鞋子,我知道她有能力给自己买的,只是不舍得花在自己身上罢了。她用的手机是我用了一年后的旧机,因为她给我买了苹果5!你相信吗?我就有一个这样的妈妈。她没有穿过名牌,却总给我们买。打开我的衣柜,大多数的衣服都不便宜,而妈妈她总给自己买些便宜货,她说她老了,穿那么好给谁看,我的妈妈,她就是那么的让人感动。现在,我都不时不时给她买东西,前几年买了个上千的包包送给她,记得她把我们痛骂了一顿,她骂我们不会赚钱怎么给她买那么昂贵的东西。那天过年去台湾旅行,我给她买了个300块的鞋子,把鞋子穿在她脚上,帮她系好鞋带,去柜台还钱,那感觉好好。妈妈摸摸我的头说她没穿过那么好穿的鞋子,那一刻我泪都飙了,300块,是我一个月四分之一的工资,就算要我用上一年的工资给她买份礼物,我觉得都不过分。 还在读书的我,基于学院要求,我得做一份工。这是人生中的第一份工作。感谢有它,才能给妈妈买份礼物。昨天和妈妈聊了蛮长的时间,她告诉我一些家庭的投资计划,把她搞得好累。他们可以不需这么做的,却依然坚持,硬着头皮努力的赚钱,只为了保障他们宝贝女儿的未来。对于那么爱我的他们,我除了感恩,感谢,我不知道我还要说什么。妈妈,我们还要分开多少年?我读完书以后的打算如何?我真的不晓得,感觉好害怕面对。妈妈,她还是我最好的支持!做工不到一年,却遇到好多问题,她总是在电话的那一旁听我说,给我安慰,她说社会是这样的,她都一把年纪了都还在面对,她总告诉我什么都得忍,感谢所有的困难与荆棘,刁难与磨练让你成长。妈妈,她好像很多时候和我心有灵犀,知道我什么时候心情欠佳了,就会给我发些加油鼓励的话,也告诉我吃得苦才能和别人争长论短。 妈妈在我的房间贴过一个‘小百合’的故事,她希望我像它一样那么坚持和刻苦去面对所有事,要相信会有先苦后甜,也会苦尽甘来。我出来一年了,接近一年了,妈妈她从来不过来看看我住的地方,我的生活环境,她说她看了会难过,因为从小过着公主般生活的我们,不忍心看着我们在这样的地方生活。其实这里也没太差,只不过少了家里那温暖的大床,舒服的车载送。我们还是过得很好,妈妈请你放心。时间好快,我和妈妈分开在那陌生的城市三个月了,最后一次在她怀里哭是三个月前的事了。好期待回家看到妈妈的脸。妈妈,给我五年时间,我会努力达成给自己设下的目标,我总要给你买上你这几十年来不舍得给自己买的物质。妈妈,这个夜里,我好想你。妈妈,谢谢你的爱,我好爱你。母亲节快乐,你要健康哦,听到你生病我真的非一般难过。

这就是我心爱的妈妈。时间,请你停下你残忍的手,不要在我妈妈脸上留下任何痕迹了,我求求你,停下来好吗...

Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Let it go

It's Wednesday. Went to class as usual. 2 weeks more to my practical exam. I'm so nervous because I hasn't well prepared. Really really really, I couldn't manage to fail any single part of it, I don't have any ability to pay for my school fees. I'm so worried but I don't know what to do. Since I skipped too many practical class, I know that I should pay for this irresponsible behavior. Talked to my 2 hubby about taking non pay leave on our pre exam lecture on 21 until 24 April, one of them told me that, you have to keep in mind and ask yourself what's more important for you at this moment. He said, we always heard you expressed the problems you faced during work but we never heard that you complain about your studies. Silence. I keep silent. Since I'm not a full time student, working is more important for me. Why I have this kind of mindset? I curious. I'm going to put my work aside first from next semester onwards, dear FCS owner, I'm sorry, I will be back soon and I will definitely be different when I'm back. Don't get mad of me for having too much of leaves, I don't want them actually. Got a wechat from you during my lesson, glad that I'm one part of the shop, but I'm off today, couldn't be able to tell you how everything's going on. Remember please, I'm having class every Wednesday and Thursday. You will never know how glad I'm to have you. How are you recently ? Seem so busy and have a bigger plan. Anyway wishing you succeed. I've many, hell a lot, tones of things to tell you. I AM NOT FINE AT ALL THESE DAYS. Am I too stressed ? I wonder. Pimples started to spread all over my faces. It's bad, bad ! On my way back home, scrolling down Facebook is what I always did inside the 1 hour LRT travel, my boys and girls were playing happily in India. They had finally explored the curryland. They were fine but not me. It had been a year  since I left them and I still stick this issue in me. Staring at their photos, how much I wish I was there. It might not be a high salary job in future but who cares about the matter right now ? Everyone is realizing their dream. I'm 20 next year, will be done my diploma next year. Is my study life ends like this ? I don't even dare to think about it. I'm depressed. I'm upset. I'm unhappy most of the times when I saw any updates from those MBBS gang. I have a world best mom. She often tried her best to comfort me. She always tell me:" Mei, let go of the past, move on with your present to future, you're doomed if you keep on holding to your past." Before this, I never know that exactly how "Move On" feel, until the day I have to do so. I want to go back so badly to achieve my dream. Dear Doraemon, can you please lend me your "turn back time machine" for me. I wanna reverse the time to January 2013. It's impossible I knew that. To do it again after my diploma ? Still considering, I might not have any guts to do it again I guess so. Back to reality, life now. Not bad also. I'm satisfied at least, with good person and good leader by my side. I cherish you. To pay for your kindness and generosity, I will try to hand in better performance. Do you ever regret to have me in your shop ? I asked this stupid question. Hopefully really not. Who am I ? I'm just a little dot. There is too many people out there more excellent than I, cleverer than I, smarter than I. I still have a big gap to go, many room for improvements. Can someone, anyone that can stand at my position with my thoughts, tell me what should I do now. Give me some suggestions please. Should or shouldn't ? Can or can't I ? Can I archive my dream without giving up here ? A stone kills 2 birds, is it possible ? Another oppose saying " you cannot burn the candle at both ends " or " you cannot have the cake and eat it " . I'm struggling. And I want to see you so badly to overcome all my problems. Girl, set yourself free, don't stressed, don't compare. Be smart, be humble, be outstanding ! Our life is not a draft, our life didn't prepare us a rubber, it's only once. There is no U-turn in life, so life well it !                                                      Don't overthink. Let it go. 

Monday, April 7, 2014

Bye MMMC gang!

Finally the day came. It's the day my lovely batch mates going to India. As promised, i went to send them off at KLIA. Their first flight was on 9:50, I need around 2 hours to reach, I woke at 5 and went out at 5:45 early in the morning. I reached there around 7:45, went to the check in counter to check the flight to Bangalore, rush to them. And finally I saw one of my favorite person, JASON LEO as others called him 'chicken neck' haha. He was wearing the Uni T which printed MANIPAL-INSPIRED BY LIFE. I wait aside to meet up with my two lovely girls, Eelyn and Joyce. I can't believe that I still cry when I saw them. Give them both a good luck gift and wishing them a flying colors success.  Hug them tight and we started to talk. So happy and so touched that we still meet each other after one long year. Once again, the question pop out in my mind: do you really want to give up ? you sure ? you sure? I couldn't answer. We are close friend ? Best friend ? No, our friendship couldn't be define. It was only one week stay with them but I love them as friend, my heart really likes them. Sending off the two lovely to the international departure hall, I met with our English lecturer Ms Jo, she brought me to meet another favourite boy of mine there, LIHANG LIM. He was shocked to see me, the face was so funny. Sat beside him, I felt good. How good if I didn't give up a year ago ? If not we will be going India together to fight for our dream. Not much things to talk to him since it had been one year of separation. He grew fatter and smarter. All those photo taken were in their phone, (photos will be upload soon) let it be the memories. I could never forget the hug, goodbye all loves ! Sorry that I can only manage to see 4 of you, I don't know where is the rest. What time now ? I think it's almost time to next flight from Bangalore to Mangalore. It's another two hours bus trip to hostel later on , horrible :( Alright boys and girls, take good care over there. Weather in India is hot, drink more water and no spicy food everyday. It's dangerous there, beware. MBBS is tough, so don't stress up yourself, have some relax sometimes. Be a good doctor kay. Can't wait to our next meet again, start counting. Take good care guys, will be missed ! I don't know why, I feel so bad. Trying hard to comfort myself, none of the decision is wrong, so don't regret. Once a decision had made, don't look back. Walk your way. I couldn't be meet a nice person right here if I stay with them. So there's no a specific true or false, let it go. Take it as a lesson, think twice, think thrice next time. My dream, when can it be reality ?

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Life goes on...

It was a normal school day. Time flies. One more week left to pre exam lecture, 3 more weeks to external practical exam. Teachers always blame me for not attending class. So this will be a super stressful exam. Couldn't manage to fail any part of it. I wonder when i start unbalance my work and study. I prefer working, really. Have a great talk with my 2 hubby which work  same company as me. Through them, I knew more details about the "superlady" manager. I admire her. She hold this position for almost 10 years and I always ask myself how come she manage to do that. She is one of my role model ! From today onwards, i should stop all my childish, foolish and silliness. Imma 19 this year, will probably end my syllabus in 20. 4 years more to the target I set to myself. And all along these years, I will choose to be staying with you. This is the last week of the month, yet I'm still unsatisfied with my achievement. How? feel so useless when comparing with others. People always told me don't compare since comparison depressed yourself. Comfort myself while lonely whereby warm myself up when alone, this is how I go through my life. Over this 19 years, I never want to be in a relationship. I don't know why but I just did. Single could be so pretty awesome. The only bad is you've no one listening to you when you face problems. And this is the biggest problem of mine now. These few months, many of my friend get married, quite shock but honestly about marriage, I never think of it. About one of the marriage, I'm not shock when knew about it meanwhile I'm sad. He was the one who care for me along my whole form 2 in secondary school. Suddenly, all those memories burst in my brain. But still congratulation for him. Best wishes from piggy to you, be a good daddy. This nickname should be shut down forever. Our first lion dance camp will be my sweet memory indeed. All these is not the main idea of my life at this moment, envy most of them sometimes but what should I do now is fighting for my future. " Destined lonely road to success ". I admit that I'm greedy, I just want to be outstanding. Don't stop me. Can you be there with me? I would appreciate you with life if you could accompany me along the way to my destination.

今天没有别人努力,明天就会被别人超越。《李嘉诚名言》
永远成功的秘密,就是每天淘汰自己,
你不与别人竞争,并不意味着别人不会与你竞争,
你不淘汰别人,就会被别人淘汰,
别人进步的同时,你没有进步,就等于退步。

成功的路上并不拥挤,因为坚持的人不多。亲爱的,加油了。



无论你今天要面对什么,既然走到了这一步,就坚持下去,给自己一些肯定,你比想象中坚强。
没有人知道上天为什么要给我们诸多试练,但请让我们记住:我们所受的痛苦,永远不白费。
没有人完美,也不能说服每个人觉得你好,做好自己就好。

就算全世界觉得我好你觉得我不好,我都会难过;
就算全世界觉得我不好你觉得我好,我都会足够。